Dita Von Teese once said "You can be the ripest, juciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches." In a training session this morning we covered diversity. We spoke about how no two teachers teach the same the same just as no two students learn the same, afterall everybody is unique. The trainer pointed out that no matter what, when we observe someone's actions, we will always encounter something we would do differently.
Our differences are what make us special, they are the building blocks of our character which set us apart from others. When we continuously strive to gain the approval of those around us, are we really doing us? Are we so worried about being judged wrongly that we alter our actions, decisions, opinions and thoughts to fit what we believe other's would want us to do or think?
When we judge another, we're not defining who they are, we're defining who we are. Why are we so quick to judge? Does this stem from our incessent need to categorise things, items, situations, people? Is it because we feel safe once we have labelled someone? We can then draw upon our past experiences with a "similar" personality or situation and know how to act and manage the relationship. Is this instinctual or evolutionary?
Maybe this is where low self esteem thrives. Constantly questioning ourselves on how we should act feeds the diminishing knowledge we have of ourselves. Our gut feeling goes out of the window, only to be replaced with hesitation and self doubt.
One of my favourite authors, Paulo Coelho said "Stress, anxiety and depression are caused when we are living to please others."
What tips do you have on living for ourselves and not to please others?
I'm going to leave it there for now and let you mull over your thoughts and the questions above. Please do feel free to leave a comment below, I'd love to hear your opinion.